Besides hope, comfort is another thing you need in times like this. When I opened up Natalie Goldberg's Long Quiet Highway to a random page the other day, the first paragraph I read led into these words:
Whether we know it or not, we transmit the presence of everyone we have ever known, as though by being in the other person's presence we exchange our cells, pass on some of our life force, and then we go on carrying that person's body, not unlike springtime when certain plants in fields we walk through attach their seeds in the form of burrs to our socks, our pants, our caps, as if to say, "Go on, take us with you, carry us to root in another place." This is how we survive long after we are dead. This is why it is important who we become, because we pass it on.
-Natalie Goldberg
I always find Natalie's words to be relevant, reassuring, full of compassion and hope, and this time I found comfort in them too. So I typed them up to keep nearby, as a reminder that those we lose will always be part of us. It will also remind me how important it is to live as well as we can, since we will one day be passing that on to others...
Beautiful. Tonight a lit a memorial candle for my Dad. Natalie's words are beautiful and relevant. Thanks for sharing them.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Julie. It's good to have ways to find comfort when we miss those who are gone, whether it's lighting a candle in their memory or hearing/reading about how others have coped/come to terms with a similar loss. Unfortunately, none of these things takes away the sadness, but we do what we can...
Delete- Lisa
A very hopeful message. I don't know that author, I am going to look at that book.
ReplyDeleteThank you
Hello, Céline, I'm happy to hear that you found hope in Natalie's words. She's not only a wonderful, very down-to-earth writer/poet, but also an artist...and she has many books full of her writings & paintings. I turn to them often and almost find inspiration in her reflections, stories, wisdom & humor...
Delete- Lisa
What beautiful sentiments, expressed so dearly by Natalie - I would hold them close too. I think at times like this, fragments, thoughts expressed or spoken, and the miracles of nature that set up some sort of rhythm to remind us that this too shall pass; that light will follow darkness and life will renew itself in Spring and all of those patterns and movements help steady us when we feel so untethered. Even tho we might not notice that they are doing it at the time...
ReplyDeleteSo true, Fiona...thank goodness for the natural rhythms that hold us together - things we can count on when other things don't seem to be making sense for us. Your thoughtful and beautiful words are also comforting - thank you!
Delete- Lisa
A beautiful passage by Natalie - being a gardener, I love the thought that people can attach themselves to us like burrs ...... or parts of people, those tender parts that imprint into us. And those strong or wise parts too. Nice to think we gather all this as we wander along. I am not sure to what you allude with your daughter but I am sure you will be a wonderful guide for her through her difficult time. And isn't it lovely when Spring arrives ..... I was reading another post from a friend in northern France saying that daffodils were flowering and didn't they know it was not yet spring. How delicious that they decide the world needs a splash of early colour.
ReplyDeleteI'm happy to hear you enjoyed the paragraph from Natalie, and that you, too, can relate to the sentiment.
DeleteTwo posts ago ("Eighteen years") I wrote about how a very close friend of my daughter/her circle had passed away out of the blue, which is what inspired me to type up Natalie's words and share them here. Over six weeks later, we continue to grieve, but it is good to see the this part of the world beginning to receive more light again. How funny about your friend's daffodils - and how wonderful the early splashing of yellow they brought!
- Lisa
I am so sorry to hear of your sadness and loss. This must be such a difficult time for you. I hope you and your daughter find solace soon.
ReplyDeleteMargaret - I imagine, like always, that time will help to heal the sadness and the emptiness, but it does still feel so new and raw... Thank you for your kind & gentle words; they do make a difference.
Delete- Lisa